2011-13 - years I didn't write a single post, was when my baby was born until she turned 3.. those were wonderful years.. wonder years.. she sucked me in completely.. I was a goner.. in a good way :)
2018-19 - nothing was missing in my life.. i had my friends, my life.. hope.. a meaningless hope.. and I forayed into tamil books.. which was amazing.. my best friend got married.. a siblings married or a best friends marriage is always a shock to one's system.. they are no longer free.. they have entered a contract that has nothing to do with you..
2020 - the year started great.. it was a dream come true.. i was in india.. but i realized very soon that this year was going to be different.. i have to let things go.. really let it go.. nothing is more pathetic than feeling unwanted.. being unwanted.. but you still have to move on.. know that you are born on this earth, you have to live in it.. do what you have to... find what satisfaction you can.. and survive.. find acceptance and peace..
here's 2020 - the beginning of a new decade, the morning after youth sleeps, the month after love breathes farewell.. to a new home, new life, new friends, new place, even new babies :).. this is going to be the year of good byes and the year of welcomes... all in all a year of change..
i wish i could be like the trees here.. they become bare with no leaves come winter.. and sprout anew come spring.. they look so desolate one month.. and so beautiful the next! nature purges and rebirths.. i want to be purged and reborn too..
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